• THE ULTIMATE INNER CIRCLE GIFT: Most people are annoying, but your person isn't. This "I Hate Everyone But Us" candle is the perfect way to celebrate your exclusive two-person club. Ideal for best friends, long-term partners, or anyone who shares your elite level of judgment.

• 100 HOURS OF SELECTIVE HANGING OUT: If you’re going to be stuck inside together, the house better smell good. Our massive 16.5oz mason jar candles offer an 80–100 hour burn time, lasting through every long venting session and mutual-complaining marathon.

• FARM-POURED & PERSONALLY APPROVED: Hand-poured on our family farm in Lebanon, Missouri, using 100% natural soy wax. It provides a clean, non-toxic burn that clears the air of "other people's drama" and replaces it with premium, farm-fresh fragrance.

• SCENTS FOR THE SOCIALLY SELECTIVE: From the "Cozy Bunker" vibes of Apples & Bourbon to the sophisticated "Privacy" notes of Sandalwood & Suede, our high-fragrance oils ensure your private sanctuary smells like an upgrade.

• USA MADE & REUSABLE MASON JAR: Proudly made in the USA with heavy-duty glass. Once the 100-hour burn is complete, clean out the jar and reuse it for storage, loose change, or a drink to toast to your favorite person.

 The "I Hate Everyone" Scent Menu

• Sandalwood & Suede (The Private Sanctuary): A rich, moody blend of dark chocolate, cedar, and velvet musk. It smells like an exclusive library where the "No Entry" sign is strictly enforced.

• Apples & Bourbon (The Guesthouse Scent): Warm orchard apples and smooth bourbon. It’s the perfect "staying in" fragrance for when you’ve successfully canceled all your plans and the door is locked.

• Fresh Linen (The Clean Getaway): A crisp, airy blend of powder and musk. It smells like fresh sheets and the absolute peace of a house where no one else is invited.

• Black Raspberry Vanilla (Sweet Seclusion): Our #1 bestseller. A luscious mix of ripe berries and creamy vanilla. A sweet reward for having excellent taste in friends (and candles).

• Sun Washed Citrus (The Bright Side): Zesty lemon and agave create a refreshing atmosphere. Because life is actually pretty bright when it’s just the two of you.

• Butt Naked (The Tropical Hideout): A fun, fruity explosion of melon, pear, and strawberry. For those who are mentally on a private island where other people aren't allowed.

• Fresh Cut Roses (I Only Like You): A true, deep rose fragrance. Nothing says "you're the only one I tolerate" like 100 hours of premium, floral luxury.