{"product_id":"parental-christmas-funny-candle","title":"Parental Christmas Funny Candle","description":"\u003cdiv class=\"container\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"markdown markdown-main-panel enable-luminous-fast-follows enable-updated-hr-color tutor-markdown-rendering\" id=\"model-response-message-contentr_2060b240bfb7c242\" aria-busy=\"false\" aria-live=\"polite\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"4\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"4\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eTHE ULTIMATE REALITY CHECK:\u003c\/b\u003e Celebrate the holiday grind with a label that doesn't sugarcoat a thing. Featuring hilarious scent notes of Three Missing Screws, Vague Diagrams, And Cussing At 2 AM, this candle is the perfect edgy gift for the friend who handles late-night toy assembly with a sense of humor and a lot of grit.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"5\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"5\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003e100 HOURS OF THE DAILY STRUGGLE:\u003c\/b\u003e Life is a marathon, and so is this candle. Our massive 16oz mason jar candles (Net Wt 13.5 oz) offer an 80–100 hour burn time, lasting through every frustrating instruction manual sheet, missing part panic, and plan for what's next.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"6\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"6\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eSMALL-BATCH FARM QUALITY:\u003c\/b\u003e The label might be cynical, but our craftsmanship is strictly top-tier. Each candle is hand-poured with love by the Lebanon Candle Company on our family farm using 100% natural soy wax for a clean, soot-free burn that clears the air.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"7\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"7\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eSCENTS FOR THE UNFILTERED:\u003c\/b\u003e From the \"Clean Slate\" vibes of Fresh Linen to the sophisticated \"Rich Reality\" notes of Sandalwood \u0026amp; Suede, our premium fragrances are designed to fill your sanctuary while you plot your next move.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"8\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"8\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eUSA MADE \u0026amp; REUSABLE MASON JAR:\u003c\/b\u003e Proudly made in the USA with heavy-duty glass. Once you’ve burned through 100 hours of late-night assembly chaos, clean out the jar and reuse it for storage, loose change, or an iced coffee to fuel your next hustle.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-path-to-node=\"9\"\u003eThe \"Parental Christmas Eve\" Scent Menu\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul data-path-to-node=\"10\"\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"10,0,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"10,0,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eSandalwood \u0026amp; Suede (The \"Classy Hustle\"):\u003c\/b\u003e A rich, sophisticated blend of dark chocolate, cedar, and velvet musk. It smells like the luxury lifestyle you deserve, even if you're currently stuck on step 4 of a plastic kitchen set.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"10,1,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"10,1,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eBlack Raspberry Vanilla (The Sweetest Reward):\u003c\/b\u003e Our #1 customer favorite. A luscious mix of ripe berries and creamy vanilla. The perfect sweet treat for surviving another high-stress holiday operation.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"10,2,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"10,2,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eApples \u0026amp; Bourbon (The \"Happy Hour\" Blend):\u003c\/b\u003e Warm orchard apples and smooth bourbon. The perfect fragrance for unwinding when the \"assembly\" part of the night is finally over.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"10,3,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"10,3,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eSun Washed Citrus (The Energy Reset):\u003c\/b\u003e Zesty lemon and agave create a crisp, refreshing atmosphere. Because even when you've been up cussing at 2 AM, you still need a bright start when the kids wake up at dawn.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"10,4,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"10,4,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eButt Naked (Tropical Joy):\u003c\/b\u003e A fun, fruity explosion of melon, pear, and strawberry. It smells like the beach vacation you’ll desperately need by December 26th.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"10,5,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"10,5,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eFresh Linen (The \"Evidence Eraser\"):\u003c\/b\u003e A crisp, clean scent with a powder and musk blend. It smells like fresh laundry and the absolute peace of a house free from wrapping paper chaos.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cp data-path-to-node=\"10,6,0\"\u003e\u003cb data-path-to-node=\"10,6,0\" data-index-in-node=\"0\"\u003eFresh Cut Roses (Ironic Luxury):\u003c\/b\u003e A true, deep rose fragrance. Nothing says \"I’m still fabulous\" like 100 hours of premium floral luxury to balance out life's rougher edges.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c!----\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Lebanon Candle Company","offers":[{"title":"Apples \u0026 Bourbon","offer_id":49811618463986,"sku":"Prnt-Chrstm-AB","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black Raspberry \u0026 Vanilla","offer_id":49811618496754,"sku":"Prnt-Chrstm-BRV","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Butt Naked","offer_id":49811618529522,"sku":"Prnt-Chrstm-BUTT","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fresh Cut Roses","offer_id":49811618562290,"sku":"Prnt-Chrstm-Rose","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fresh Linen","offer_id":49811618595058,"sku":"Prnt-Chrstm-Fresh","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sandalwood \u0026 Suede","offer_id":49811618627826,"sku":"Prnt-Chrstm-Sndl","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sun Washed Citrus","offer_id":49811618660594,"sku":"Prnt-Chrstm-Sun","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0228\/1236\/0740\/files\/ParentalCHRISTMASEve.jpg?v=1784204913","url":"https:\/\/www.lebanoncandle.com\/products\/parental-christmas-funny-candle","provider":"Lebanon Candle Company","version":"1.0","type":"link"}